madmonq’s joint


Jaw Jaw Jinx
November 28, 2008, 1:14 pm
Filed under: PHOTOS, Sarah Palin, antifeminism, carny life, christian, christians, conservative, culture, democrat, democrats for mccain, feminism, humor, media, news, picture, politics, religion, republican, vice president, writing

The Horseface of the Apocalypse has been silenced…for now.

THAT although we didn’t think it would be possible to silence Ann Coulter, the leggy reactionary broke her jaw and the mouth that roared has been wired shut.

jar-jar-binks

 “Peeuwsa!”

In other news

I am, in many ways, an average guy.  And I recognize that Governor Palin is considered by many people to be an attractive person.  But sometime during the campaign I realized her towering stupidity was such a obstruction to my usual unerringly male sensibilities that I was repulsed by the idea of Googling for the porn movie based on her life.  Or any other nude pictures available.  Fake or otherwise.

Then Us Magazine printed this picture.  And my wife pretty much summed it up…

“Jesus.  To think this woman was almost our vice president.  Sitting there with her coochie almost hanging out.”

Almost.

Palin by the Pool

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Holiday Gas Prices
November 26, 2008, 11:03 am
Filed under: business, conservative, culture, democrat, money, news, republican, vice president

Oil prices tumble; gas falls to 2004 levels

Gasoline prices nationwide continued to decline, falling 2.3 cents overnight to $1.885, their lowest levels since September 2004 when the average price for three days was $1.886, according to auto club AAA, the Oil Price Information Service and Wright Express. The current price is $1.20 below where it was a year ago and down $2.225 from the peak in July when prices hit $4.11 per gallon.

From Time Magazine May 19th 2001

The attempt was to lay out the dire reality; the effect was to just sound dour. One sentence in particular — “conservation may be a sign of personal virtue, but it is not a sufficient basis for a sound, comprehensive energy policy” — led to a wave of bad press and gave the administration’s critics fresh ammunition to dismiss the plan as a sop to the oil, gas and coal industries.

Isn’t that what happened anyway?  Remember Vice President and war profiteer Dick Cheney’s secret meetings with the Energy Industry?

We went from $4+ a gallon to somewhere under $2 a gallon.  It’s about $1.79 in my area.  $1.79!  I almost want to pull up to the pump and yell out, Rodney Dangerfield style “Hey everybody!  A full tank a regular gas on me!  For everyone!”  At that price It would only cost a little more than what a full tank used to cost me.

Oil prices were crashing from conservation before the stock market bottomed out.  Conservation works but maybe that term is not quite correct in this case.  Forced conservation is more accurate.

We’ve worked together, lessened our burden and reversed the trend. Now the companies are “hurting.”  Again, a relative term.  There are no politicians to thank.  We have ourselves to thank for it.

You did it.  Good work everyone.  Really.  I mean that.

Now you afford to visit the family for Thanksgiving.  The down side?  Now you’ve got no excuse not to visit the family for Thanksgiving.

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Obama Liquor Cabinet and Weekend Political Link Dump
November 21, 2008, 9:51 am
Filed under: Barack Obama, Obama, Obama 08, President, President Barack Obama, TV, christianity, christians, church, conservative, crime, culture, democrat, entertainment, family, feminism, god, independent, jesus, legal, media, news, politics, religion, republican, television, video, war

Were There No Ax Murders Available for your Cabinet, Mr Obama? Edition***

Obama’s Awkward Group Photo

Christopher Buckley points out the proper way to block a soccer goal via the Obama Staff’s group shot.   Either that or they’re happy to see him. The soccer line up is a real sausage fest.  You mean to tell me there are only a few woman to fill out your staff, Mr. Obama?  You’ll need to do better with your cabinet picks.  From your choices so far, they can be vastly improved by an array of qualified men and woman of all backgrounds. Just imagine that group shot.  That would be an amazing message to send to the world.  Unlike his choice for White House Counsel.  See bottom post.

Women hope to fill ranks of Obama’s Pentagon

Bush’s Broken Record

American Conservative Magazine punches nearly former President Bush where Obama’s staff hands are.  More fodder for history to confirm.  I actually like traditional conservative thought.  It follows a logical course, whereas Bush’s neo-con gut check drivel couldn’t be bothered.  The current batch of Republicans are clueless.  It’s going to be years before the electorate trusts them again.  At no fault of the traditional conservative.  Maybe a little.

More Layoffs at Focus on the Family

Dobson’s Focus on the Family isn’t doing so well.  The break up with the Republican party has been hard on them.  Dobson has started seeing a younger, more attractive political party that will understand his needs as a man.  Then he bought a sports car.

You see?  The Obama Presidency is already breaking up families!  Replacing them with the gay test tube babies.  Oh wait.  More layoffs?  It’s still Obama’s fault!

***Then there are some reeeally questionable appointees for Obama’s staff

Greg Craig Attorney at Law and Obama choice for White House Counsel.  If you read the link you’ll find he’s more an attorney at Out-Law.

The choice isn’t so much political as partisan.  Then by extension political.  And weird.  The list of his of past clients aren’t people I’d figure Obama wouldn’t want associated with his presidency.   Some are just embarrassingly partisan.  A really troubling message is sent.

This guy is liberal.  ACLU Liberal.  Like, defended-John Hinkley-the-guy-who-shot-Reagan-liberal.  Ew.  Say what you want but this guy is creepy.  Yes Hinkley is creepy but I mean Greg Craig.  Even if his intentions are honorable, extreme altruism can apparently put you in league with some truly shady characters.  What’s next? Larry Sinclair as Drug Czar?

Perhaps Greg Craig is well connected and well thought enough in Washington that I’m overreacting.  Maybe but somehow I don’t think so.  Obama’s cabinet application seems to be for material to use for reacting to scandals, not preventing them.   A good idea politically.  Better to avoid the appearance altogether.  Just ew.

I thought he knew better than that. Very little mainstream coverage of this clown.  Thus a conspiracy begins.  Bad form Mr Obama.  Bad form.

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Where is Mr Frodo and Samwise Gamgee When You Need Them?
November 17, 2008, 8:16 am
Filed under: PHOTOS, TV, entertainment, fiction, film, lord of the rings, media, movies, news, picture, pictures, pop culture, sci fi, science fiction, scifi, space, television, video

eyeofhubble2

New Galaxy

eyeofsauron

Ultimate Evil

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Salaam Al-Alaikum, Fundamentalists, Neo-Cons & PUMAs Suckas!!!
November 5, 2008, 12:14 pm
Filed under: Barack Obama, George W Bush, Hillary Clinton, John McCain, McCain, Obama, Obama/Biden 08, PUMA, President, President Barack Obama, Sarah Palin, christian, christians, conservative, culture, democrat, democrats for mccain, election, god, jesus, libertarian, media, news, nobama, peace, politics, presidential election, religion, vice president, war

Translation: In your face, suckas!

I’d forgotten what it was like to be this kind of hopeful.  For the moment, that’s what this is about.  Next we celebrate Bush leaving office.  We have reason to look forward to good things.  But it’s going to be hard on the nation for a while.  Three things to worry about.  Turning the economy around, fighting a war or two / terrorism and restoring our place in the world.  Yeah.  Exactly.

Me?  My first thoughts were ”Time to gloat!

I don’t care for sports like most guys.  Getting so emotionally involved in sports or something they take wins and losses as a personal slight.  Except with politics.

So Democrats, it’s time.    Time to celebrate!  Celebrate like your team just won the Super World Series Bowl.

Paint your body blue, put on a giant foam #1 hand, get into everyone’s face screaming ”Wooooo!!” just like that guy everyone hates.  We’ll find ourselves standing in a parking lot, ripped up stadium seating in hand, staggering and staggeringly drunk, missing a tooth.  Later we’ll get arrested.

There have been some true assholes out there who deserve some obnoxious derision.  That’s a fact.

I am already sick of hearing people say, mostly on TV, “It’s historic because he’s black and the nation is a better place because of it!”  True.  SOME people voted for him based on race, yes.  But the implication is that’s a major reason he was elected.   He couldn’t have gotten a majority unless the we really wanted him there.  Not for whitey to make themselves feel better.  Or that black people are just that one dimensional.  If that’s the case, take a xanex like normal white people and vote for the best candidate anyway.

Obama to Begin Intelligence Briefings

Victory Sparks Cheers around the Globe

It’s nice to actually use intelligence (security and otherwise) and have friends around the world once again.  It’s sort of needed in order to accomplish anything.

We did it.  America did it.  We need a few more successes to make us all feel things will get better.  We have reason to be positive, I think.  But I’m not of the opinion a politician can fix our problems.  Not to be presumptive, but neither should you.  They can only push us in a general direction.  You and I have work to do.  Federal government or no.

We make it happen.

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2008 President Election Results Video Here
November 4, 2008, 2:46 pm
Filed under: Barack Obama, John McCain, McCain, Obama, Obama 08, PUMA, President, Sarah Palin, conservative, democrat, democrats for mccain, election, media, news, nobama, politics, pop culture, presidential election, republican, vice president, video

Basically it’s Boo Radley / McCain Vs Mr Tuvok / Obama . You’d be surprised how accurate the similarities are.  Good hearted outsider who was kept in the dark for years by an oppressive family structure (the Repubs) and a good hearted hyper-logical brother from another planet.  I know I’ve got my favorite.

Please vote.* Please have a good day.

*More than once If you are an ACORN representative.

http://www.pinktentacle.com/2007/04/movie-qr-code-and-kung-fu-high-school-girls/

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The Terrorists Choice for President
November 3, 2008, 11:11 am
Filed under: Barack Obama, John McCain, McCain, Obama, Obama 08, Obama/Biden, Obama/Biden 08, PUMA, President, Sarah Palin, business, carny life, christianity, conservative, crime, culture, democrat, democrats for mccain, election, faith, islam, libertarian, news, politics, pop culture, presidential election, religion, republican, vice president, war

WASHINGTON — Al Qaeda supporters suggested in a Web site message this week they would welcome a pre-election terror attack on the U.S. as a way to usher in a McCain presidency.

The message, posted Monday on the password-protected al-Hesbah Web site, said if Al Qaeda wants to exhaust the United States militarily and economically, “impetuous” Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain is the better choice because he is more likely to continue the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

“This requires presence of an impetuous American leader such as McCain, who pledged to continue the war till the last American soldier,” the message said. “Then, Al Qaeda will have to support McCain in the coming elections so that he continues the failing march of his predecessor, Bush.”

I can’t wait for this thing to be over.  After November 11th I hope to go back to snarky pop culture sweet nothings.  I’m starting to sound like Ann Coulter.  Or Keith Obermann with balls.

You’d think the terrorists would support their own kind, Obama being an Arab and all.  But just like the Eisenhower’s Military Industrial Complex they know where their bread is buttered.

Because of Republican chest thumping, not thinking more than five minutes ahead of themselves, they’ve actually helped to make us weaker.  Not stronger but weaker.  And terrorists have been taking advantage of it for years.

Drug money from Afghanistan and our support money to Pakistan is finding it’s way into terrorist training camps within their territory.  The Pakistani government has to pay them off to keep them from regular attacks on their institutions and infrastructures.  The United Arab Emirates and the Saudi Government turn a blind eye to terrorist to limit any attacks on their territories.  The $100 dollars you for spend every 3 days SUV driving is subsidizing their continued allowance of terrorist passage.

http://www.adnkronos.com/AKI/English/Security/?id=3.0.2562368253

http://www.nation.com.pk/pakistan-news-newspaper-daily-english-online/Politics/20-Oct-2008/Afghan-money-fuels-terrorism-in-Pakistan

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/06/24/pakistan.pentagon.money/index.html

These are all policies that assist the terrorists rather than killing or choking them off.  They need to surrender or die.

Years of Bush / McCain Neo Con policies have actually encouraged and helped them to continue.  That’s why they want McCain.  We didn’t win the Cold War with superior fire power.  We beat them with superior spending on similar firepower.  Our over-extension based on wrong headed policies, the terrorists are using the same ploy against us.  With a debt as large as ours, we are now like Russia 2009.  In more ways than one.  The Russian government of any time frame sucks.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/26/opinion/26kristof.html?partner=permalink&exprod=permalink

John McCain is a good person.  I might have voted for him in 2000. The antics of the massively stupid neocons, the religious wing nuts, the huge waste of money and loss of lives have burned that bridge for years to come.

This blog might lean left, but I’ll take any policy that makes sense.  Do your country a favor and let us cut the terrorists and those who support them (however well meaning they think they are), off at the balls. I’ve had enough of their foolishness.

America is an amazing country.  Even with our flaws the rest of the world still look to us as the example to follow.  If you live in this country you know what the right thing is, what is the best thing to do.

Vote Obama.

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