Wondering if snake handling Christians dye snake eggs on Easter or just play in their poo like they do every day?
As opposed to spending the day endangering my children around poisonous snakes or nearly as bad, cooped up in a mind dulling church service straight jacketed by the polyester of clothing & thought I will be spending the day playing with my children in the park & enjoying the company of my wife.
Tell me: Which sounds like the more Christian activity to you? My option does. You are right.
I was hoping my Christmas wouldn’t end with an open can o’ on saleBlack Thanksgiving whoop azz on unsuspecting shoppers. Now I look forward to ending Santa’s reign of terror when that mother grabber goes after Grandma with his reindeer. That Rudolph is a commie with his red nose & all.
And I still say “Christmas” not “Holiday” like a good gun totin’ Christian-AmericanWalmartgreeter.
I don’t think someAmericanswill be happy until they get a Jesus on the cross with an AK strung around his neck like he went down like Scarface. Otherwise they’re liable to shoot him in the face when He returns for not fighting back against the Romans. Not dying in a hail of bullets like a real Christian American. That’s how fucking ridiculous it’s gotten.
Better to frighten my children by posing them on the lap of some creep in a polyester bunny suit than delivering them to a room full of creeps in their Sunday best. Whereas creepiness is concerned, polyester is always involved.
Otherwise please meet with family. Enjoy your time with them if possible. Eat a ham or something. Jesus would be pleased by that.
With sincerity, please have a good day. Happy Easter from madmonq’s joint.
P.S. I actually scared myself a little creating this post. Sincerely.
I am reading one of the many lists of events from the past year. One of them is the list of significant or important deaths in the year 2010. I’d already forgotten that Leslie Nielson had died. That’s probably because I thought he was dead already. Anyone else have this experience? Where is the list of people you though were dead already?
I am always shocked to learn that Ernest Borgnine is still alive. If so they need to get on a “The Black Hole” remake or sequel or whatever Pretty Damn Quick or else miss that window of opportunity (such as it is). Also Mariane McPartland? Isn’t she dead? And if she isn’t, why isn’t she? She hasn’t been on “Piano Jazz” in like forever & when she is you feel like it could happen at any moment. What about Adam Ant? If not by natural causes then by embarrassment? Also all of those poor Chilean miners. I also keep thinking Patti Smith is dead. Then I hear about some accolade she’s received for whatever god awful terrible crap she’s done. As soon as it’s over I go back to thinking, immediately and assuredly, that she is dead. Again.
Joey Ramone is dead.
Patti Smith is not. Do you see the problem I am having?
My wife is always claiming American newsperson Tom Brokaw is dead when we we come to realize it was Peter Jennings all along and that he died a long time ago. I guess the whole newscaster, haircut, suit, newscaster thing sort of blurs the lines. And either Bernie Mac or George Lopez is dead. Though one of them has a talk show before Conan O’Brian so I suppose I should check it out. Also I heard Jay Leno was dead. Or was that ”The Tonight Show with Jay Leno”? Or maybe the whole ”dead” thing was a metaphor for Jay killing “The Tonight Show” after all of his whining. Right. Steve Guttenberg is another. Wouldn’t be a good guest on “The Tonight Show” or Bernie Mac’s talk show either, I guess.
Why don’t I check the interet to see who is alive/dead? This is why. The internet is confusing and lies to me.
List of people I always think are still alive but are still dead: Charles Schulz, Bea Arthur, Ray Charles, Pat Morita and Scatman Crothers. I always think Charles Schulz is still alive. I guess because his strip still sees regular print. I wish the Scatman were still alive but he isn’t. A price had to be paid for appearing in the film Zapped! An appropriate but terrible price, nontheless.
Hey there, Scatman you sure you wanna do that movie with that Baio kid?
“My Little Drum.” One of the overlooked songs from Vince Guaraldi’s“A Charlie Brown Christmas”, Guaraldi’s . Variations on “The Little Drummer Boy.” I love the monastic boombastic of the original, Guaraldi’s is more funky & soulful than anyone other than he could imagine at the time. A Christmas samba. Guaraldi and Charles Schulz inform the modern day suburban creative sect (AKA the hipster) when they are at their best and far more than they’ll ever admit.
Vinnie G
Listening to the Vince Guaraldi channel on Last.FM/Xbox I can plainly hear that the slope created by be-bop in the 1950s to modern day easy listening music. “Lite” jazz, Kenny G, new age music and the even more dreaded world beat. Listen to Herb Alpert and you’ll hear what kind of monster it’s created. The cheese pouring forth pretty much created the hotel lounge act industry and appears to have inspired every porn soundtrack you’ve ever heard. Only not in a good way. Herb Alpert defines the trappings of the hipster: A complete lack of style and/or talent covered in cheese and hubris. The point is, I’m trying to teach the babies something even by osmosis. I think Vince Guaraldi is a good start. I hope they like it.
Guccioni or Not Bob Guccioni
Herb Alpert or Not Herb Alpert
Bonus: What do you get when you cross the “The Little Drummer Boy” with “My Little Drum?” I think you know.
The Bing & The Bowie that’s what. I mean, Bing Crosby is more bad ass than Herb Alpert. And he’s dead. Der Bingle, that is. Herb Alpert less so.
Bonus Bonus!
Will Ferrell sounds less like David Bowie and more like a James Lipton with a mullet.
Bonus Bonus Bonus!
That’s right. James Brown “The Funky Drummer.” The funk that Guaraldi, Bing or Bowie can only dream of. I’d suggest that you don’t sit through the whole song. It’s 9 minutes long and despite the name, the Funk gets pretty boring after a while.
Some months ago I found myself awake in the middle of the night with two tiny people I barely knew and who barely knew me, trusting me with their night feeding. As they were newborns they didn’t even know from choice and I obviously didn’t know what I had gotten myself into. Bleary eyed and exhausted, sleepless in the dark and the night will always play tricks on you. Given considerable responsibilites and live long changes you find yourself in, you don’t think you will ever get over the shock of it: Bringing 2 new people into the world. It seems like the dumbest thing you’ve ever done and now you’ve got to deal with it.
I am watching “Imagine:John Lennon“, a documentary made in 1988, 8 years after his death. The short film for the song “Strawberry Fields Forever” comes on and I find myself removed from the babies. I’ve heard the song a million times, but the dark, the night, the strange context I’ve found myself in make it sound new again. I’m lost in it.
The song was made during one of the groups’ transitional periods. The Beatles were still better known at that time as a four-headed monster with the same hair cut, a boy band basically, maturing and eventually becoming (and I say this with no exaggeration) multicultural multigenerational pop culture superstars. Gods, if that sort of thing is to be believed and one doesn’t look too closely.
Such is the documentary. A close look at a fallen idol, warts and all. Because of the context, because of the late hour, because of the thousands of lost hours of sleep, and lost sleep to still to come, I am very susceptible to the subject and subject matter. I feel very vulnerable about me, my marriage, the children, my place in the world that I cannot help but yet again feel related to this fairly flawed fairly trouble multimillionaire British pop star. He is human after all. Later, after the Beatles, he makes a point of highlighting how much we all, after all are human, boring and extraordinary at the same time. Sitting up surrounded by two proto-people, in the dark and very alone with my thoughts, I know what he means.
This is my son
This is my daughter
This is my wife
This video is more about the song lyrics here than it is about the images, obviously.
You should know that when ”Double Fantasy” was released 30 years ago after the death of John Lennon it wasn’t very well received. It’s not that it was bad, it just wasn’t as good as some of his earlier work. What’s remarkable about it is that he is happily singing about middle aged family life. It’s not boring but fun. His trademark honesty is apparent even if the subject matter isn’t interesting to anyone but me I suppose. I think people were expecting fire and brimstone music and lyrics. What they got was, in many ways, an average guy who was very happy with his life at the time. I think I know how he felt.
I cannot help but feel quite ordinary & quite extraordinary. You should too. There’s not much more that we can do about it but choose to be happy. Not stupid but happy. Reasoning, choice and compassion are the center of all human power. Reason. Difficult to use wisely. Chosing happiness is the easy one. Living it is another thing. I’m still working on it, I’m just glad to know that choosing a bit of optimism was justified for once.
No need to be alone.
Happy Christmas, Easter, Kwanza, um Hanukkah & anything else you need to get you through the night. It’s alright. Just don’t be a jerk about it.
How the hell did Monty Python know about it? This clip is like 40 years old and filmed on another continent. Evidently they’re not only still funny but a bit more clairvoyant than they let on.
Translation: Dragon*Con is in town this weekend. As some of you may know my wife & I had twins a few months ago. They are funner than Dragon Con, about as expensive as the entrance price (only every day) and currently weigh as much as I can carry in comics. Comics that will eventually be worth the price of a used diaper. Babies also involve only slightly less cosplay and Leonard Nimoy will definately will not make an apperance at your home for less than $10,000 and a full figured lady of his choosing. Otherwise, just like Dragon*Con.
Only we cannot attend. Probably not attend. What happen is when you have kids, that means you’ve evidently reached your independant fun/freedom limit for the next 20-30 years. It’s also no place for very young babies where the crowds swell to near Chinese in proportion. Twin newborns sort of makes us feel that way nearly every day. In a good way.
A Care Bear and not some sort of pervy anime as was my first guess. Courteousy of anitasarkeesian
Original Wonder Girl and Black Manta in a hotel lobby walk of shame
The comedy stylings of Shatner & Nimoy on the big screen.
Dragon*Con, or almost any themed convention I suppose, can make you feel like Bicycle Repair Man: Special for being normal while surrounded by the sublime*. And I mean that in a good way.
*Crikey. With all the Viking costumes, Bishop get ups and other cross dressing, Monty Python’s Flying Circus practically invented Cosplay and making fun of Cosplayers. Decades before the Tron Guy**.
**Tron Guy not appearing at Dragon*Con this year. Unless Chad Vaderdrops out. Sorry.
Now if you'll excuse me I do believe I have a case of the vapors 2 hours ago
Knowing @DavidBHayter read ur tweet is the definition of glee.Also surprising like a step from the dark.Well done Mr Hayter.You do both well 2 hours ago
